Instagram : @peejburhan

hati sudah tak ada~

so i've been blogging for 4 years now.
takda la lama. baru aje. kalau anak maksudnya tak masuk tadika pun lagi kan.
entah bagi aku. aku rasa macam lama.
esp bila update hari-hari.

ingat lagi dulu-dulu.
segala benda buat ingat blog aje.
bangun tido ke, keluar memana ke, serious rindu nak bukak blog.
sekarang perasaan tu dah takda. ok i love my blog.
tapi dah tak thrill macam dulu.
aku dah rasa blogging ni jadi beban. ok takda la beban mana.
tapi macam bangun je then rasa, " huish nak update apa eyh. nanti orang tanya apesal tak update"
so macam tak suka. macam rasa dipaksa2 gitu.
ceh. padahal takda sapa paksa kan. tapi sendiri rasa.

baru2 ni mama tanya.
apesal aku pemalas update.
dia kata if dia bukak je asyik2 tajuk yang sama.
dulu rajin.
sebab aku rasa aku dah tak tau nak cerita apa.
4 years cerita yang sama aje. aku pun muak kan.
then aku cakap. orang lain semua tak bagi cerita pasal dorang.
people wanna keep their life personal.
so nak cerita apa kan?

then keluar pulak statement2 macam.
eh kau jangan update pasal ni. kawan2 kerja aku baca.
eh jangan la. nanti orang tu baca. orang ni dengki. orang tu busy body.
so aku jadi macam, "what??? abis apa je aku boleh update"
dulu ada jugak la kekasih gelap ke apa.
sekarang takda. so nak cerita apa? u tell me?
then bila semua dah tak boleh. automaticnya aku pun dah tak ingat nak snap gambar if la keluar ke apa.
kadang2 camera pun takda dlm handbag.
semua tak boleh. tak lama lagi last2 if ada pic dalam blog ni nanti. memang muka aku aje.
abis dah semua orang takleh nak keluar muka kat sini. nice kan.

so tadi aku tweet.
how do people do it? i mean keep on blogging n share their life with the world.
tak bosan ke kan?
entah aku sendiri bosan pasal life aku.
n entah kenapa. adakah aku n noy ni terlebih sensitif ke apa.
tapi ada macam rasa annoyed if people ask about our personal life.
macam aku la. ok aku blog. aku cerita2. tapi thats it la kan.
kenapa ada orang nak tanya or korek2 benda yang aku tak cerita.
aku tau niat orang ikhlas. sebab dorang dah rasa kenal. so ada something missing dorang nak tau la.
tapi tah. aku rasa macam tak suka la.
sebab bagi aku. if aku tak cerita tu. aku rasa nak keep it to myself. :|

aku ada baca entry aku lama2.
my god memang semua aku cerita.
maybe sebab time tu reader 200 macam tu.
so kau rasa selesa tau.
silent reader ni semua kurang la.
so kau macam kenal reader2 kau.
macam baru2 ni. ramai reader2 aku dpd zaman aku start blogging email n all.
semua aku kenal. eventho dah 3 thn sepi je dorang.
sebab back then dunia blogging ni semua orang ikhlas nak berkawan n all.
like now. kalau dah sampai 5000-6000 . boleh ke kau kenal siapa yang baca blog kau?
memang tak la kan.
segala mak nenek semua ada. yang kat kampung la, jiran la, kawan sekolah la, reader kak nam ada, yang talam ada. semua la cukup perisa.
tiba2 aku rasa macam taknak share dah. oh aku gila.
tp itu la yang aku rasa for the past 6 months kot. or maybe more. entah.

sebab tu sekarang aku lagi suka twitter.
sebab it's private. aku boleh kawal siapa je yang ada.
itu pun ada yang aku tak kenal. tapi kesian. bagi je la.
walaupun ada terselit sesuatu kat dalam follower aku. takpa kasi chance.
itu pun ramai add. tp aku tak hadap nak follower ramai ke apa.
janji aku selesa ngan sesiapa yang follow.
twitter ni jadi macam my new blog la.
semua aku cerita kat situ. happy sikit.
aku dah takda sangat rasa macam tu kat blog ni.
aku kadang2 update pun sebab mama suruh.
macam cerita beraks2 topi2 tu.
mama kata, " kelakar nak. tulis la kat blog. if kau tak tulis biar mama tulis"
tgk mama tak buat pun. so ok la. aku buat.

ok aku pun tak tau nak tulis apa dah.
saja luahan perasaan.
maybe one day blog ni akan sepi.
or maybe dia tetap hidup tapi macam hidup segan mati tak mahu.
or maybe tiba2 roh kerajinan n mood mari. tiba2 blog ni meriah macam dulu.
i dont know.

ok. thanks sebab membaca entry yang pointless ini.
oh, n thanks sebab masih membaca blog ni selepas berapa tahun.

36 Comments:

Anonymous said... [Reply to Comments]

janganla gitu. cam frust je.memang btul kadang2 tu kita kena jaga hati orang.tapiiii kalau nko tak update blog k.mas rindu la nak baca...(kak mas yong peng)

Hanisumayyah said... [Reply to Comments]

kak wa masih baca w.pun xkomen, kadang baca just isi masa lapang, jadi rutin...teruskanlah tulis, kalo xde apa2 nak tulis, bagi jer ceramah ker apa ker...tulis benda2 baik pun ok jugak..dapat pahala apa...mcm kak wa selesa privatekan blog sejak dulu, blh luah apa sahaja, malah semua pembaca blog dah jadi kaunselor xbertaulaiuh pulak...

Queen said... [Reply to Comments]

sometimes akan rasa macam tu...ko bayangkan...blog aku nie memang ada parasit yang TIAP_TIAP HARI BUKAK ok...lagi la ko rasa macam nak update apa2 tersangkut...So bila gini aku tulis la apa2 yang aku rasa happy. Kocing melintas ke..ape ke...kan..
Ehehehe....

Aku paham apa ko rasa..sebab masa aku tak sampai setahun berblogging lagi dah start org tak bagi aku tulis pasal diorang..pasal itu.pasal ini... Aku paham pe ko rasa...

Naseb baik husband aku je yang supporting..kadang tu dia yang bagi idea nak tulis ape...

Ko tulis jela ape2 pun...peminat ko dah ramai..

APa2 pun..buat apa yang ko selesa nak buat..kalau ko happy..aku pun happy k!

Alia said... [Reply to Comments]

Babe, I still enjoy reading your blog walaupon tak der gambar ke apa. That's what you get; loyal readers. We understand your predicament and yet, hari hari mesti nak bukak your blog. And some of us turned to be your real life friends. So your 4 years in the blogosphere weren't wasted lah.

Blogging isn't paksaan, so take your time.

I learned that I kenot force myself to write an entry, kalau tak entry jadi sampah.
Ok mmg entry aku hari hari sampah, but that's besides the point.

I also realized that we are not bound by the term "Freedom of speech" too. Kita still tertakluk dlm undang undang cyber. Tak boleh tulis itu, tulis ini. That actually limits of what I CAN write.

Since I can't write of what I THINK, I resorted to writing of WHAT HAPPENED in my daily life...in a form of stick man lately.

Ok, I don't this doesn't actually help in your case, but I'm just making a point that everybody has been/is in your shoes too and it's perfectly fine if you've decided to take a break.

shiela said... [Reply to Comments]

blog bes kalau untuk kawan2 je baca..so that kawan2 boleh keep in touch ngan kite..tp bile dah jadi telalu ramai baca, and kalau komen2 tak bes pulak yg kite dpt..mcm x berapa bes kan..huhu

Siti Nornadiah said... [Reply to Comments]

sedih ah macam nie..

alwaradzi said... [Reply to Comments]

nak cakap nie je..dont stop blogging..i lurve your blog..ok tue je.. =D

cik gObu said... [Reply to Comments]

please don't stop blogging

enjoy baca tulisan2 u

sbb bg i tulisan u mmg ikhlas sgt
:D

Anonymous said... [Reply to Comments]

ko tau peej..start aku follow blog ko which is in 2009...aku dpt confident sikit nak memakai baju2 yg kaler2 sikit dan berfashion...kalu idak itam memanjang..al maklumlah size kita lebih kurang...

yup kekadang kita rasa kita wat pointless entry tapi kita tak tau impact entry tuh pada orang lain...as for me..entry makan2 ko selalu jadi craving aku dan aku lebih creative dlm nak berbaju bila tengok cara ko berbaju...eh cam mana aku nak terangkan ek...ko paham kot...

LIN

adayinmylife said... [Reply to Comments]

Babe.. Janganlah ilangkan terus mood tu.. Aku suke gak bace blog ko.. Sangat meriah! Takde pic pun xpe.. Nak tepek muke ko je pun aku suke.. Blog ko, ko tepek jela ratus ribu gambor sendiri... Walaupun aku baru je bace blog ko ni kan... Tp da jadi peminat setie ok.. Entry lame2 pn aku bace. Aku suke! N twitter tu aku follow tp ko x app ko.. Sian aku...

Deqna said... [Reply to Comments]

dari dulu sampai sekarang tak pernah boring pun baca blog ini. Keep on writing yer...

BHMB said... [Reply to Comments]

ala..biasala tu..
dh salu sgt apded n tulis citer yg sama..mst kita rasa boring..plus mood pun tingtong..haii..lg la xde mood nk apded..
tp jgn bhenti..maybe u can start mcm ur mum's blog..siap ada episod kehidupan tu suma..it's good actually..merangsang daya ingatan namanya..
keep on writing la..hari2 mesti nk jenguk baca blog u n ur mum..
love it..
-silent reader yg x brp nk silent dh..hehe..-
sori bahasa adalah singkatan ntah apa2..ikut suka tgn je nk taip..hehe

Sue@Iza said... [Reply to Comments]

peej, nnt kalo kau menyepi je...sape nak buat aku gelak ngan entry die.....

sobbss,sobbsss...

Anonymous said... [Reply to Comments]

citer la pasal zaman kecik2, pasal aunty nani yang garang bersebab pasal papa ko, pasal deco rumah ko yg sgt cantik (kagum tgk bilik air ko cantik)

Anonymous said... [Reply to Comments]

n preview pasal movies

lilRed Farah said... [Reply to Comments]

aku start baca blog kau masa kau pergi beach party dengan noy. beach party ke dj apa dtg yg kemain penuh pantai and u guys kene parking jauh gile. time tu aku mcm... curious, amazed, sbb ade anak melayu (and errr plus size?) yg berani and daring. well, aku kan kampong. eh tak, aku kan suci lg ayu... bahahhaha no la, the point is, there is something in u and ur family which i find it interesting and makes me put everything aside and started to dig ur blog until it becomes a habit untuk dtg sini. aku pon tak igt la mana aku jumpe link kau. tp mmg seronok la baca, tak stress dan membuat aku nak amukan selepas membaca. instead it send me huge smile everytime.

aku masih igt masa korg ketagih swimming, i miss cemot and aku suke tgk kemeriahan adik beradik korg. well aku kan tade adik beradik not untill recently. korg raya meriah meriah siap masak ke luar apa smue, aku raya buat apa? online :| tp seriously dulu aku takot dengan kau. aku takot dengan tina. hahhaha aku rasa korg sume mcm sgt moden dan garang. aku, well...kampong T_T

tp alhamdulillah, Allah has brought us together, mungkin la tade rapat cemolot but i know we r comfortable with each other. dan dr blog kau aku dpt customer yg tetibe sebanrnye kawan sekolah rendah aku.apakah kawan aku pon baca blog kau? hahahhahaha

aku tau kau mungkin dah tak selesa nak share life ko ke apa, tp ok apa bila kau share pasal game. aku yg baca masalah rumah tangga tu sampai pening kepala.serious konflik ok. takpon if kau masak, kau tulis la resipi sini. ok je. eh bukan senang org can read ur crap w/o any pictures tau. ade stengah blog melambak gambar pon tulis mcm nak kasik amukan, kasik org heart attack.

hamik kau sekali komen mcm nak buat karangan. dah la aku berenti. babai!

Marina Monroe said... [Reply to Comments]

Peeja dear, you are still very very young, and life inshaAllah is still long way to go.
You must not feel bored..or are u lazy now??
Life is so beautiful if u know to appreciate. Life is full of challenge, leave the people behind if you dont feel easy to be with, there are many hypocrite people, dont you ever blinded with sweet talks. Recite zikir, Ar Rahman 100x and Ar Rahim 500x it wont take you more than ten mins, you will feel rejoice and life will be more meaningful and success for you..InshaAllah.
Mama and Papa and others love of what u are..
Be happy dear.

Nad.is.me said... [Reply to Comments]

Aku suka entry kau masa kau ungkap kenangan dedulu time kecik-kecik. (Entry lain pun suka jugak yep. Hehe.) Siap lukis-lukis alahaiiiii. Adakah orang yg rajin sebegini siap lukis sebab nak kasi kita bayangkan keadaan tu macam mana. :')

Tak kisahlah peeja, apa pun keputusan kau, yang penting memang I've enjoyed reading your blog for the past 3 years. :)

mUnie UncLe hUsin said... [Reply to Comments]

you wrote/type/blog from your heart~
i just love it..
keep on blogging~

aNnAsUe'G said... [Reply to Comments]

dah 2 thn aku follow blog ko tp sampai skrg aku tak muak lg kot? so keep on blogging bebeyh!

alynz said... [Reply to Comments]

peej...
plz jgn stop blogging..
im one of ur silent reader..
everyday sampai ofis jer mesti nak tgk blog u n ur mom tau..kdg2 rasa addicted..hehe. if i rasa down baca what u ngarut2 n all those things buat i hepy lupa semua...i dont care kalau ada some people ckp u nie mcm2, but for me u r not hypocrite...

take care peej...!
u done a great job..love it!

~ mizzAmy ~ said... [Reply to Comments]

kak peeja, amy start baca blog kak peeja since yg FS lagi kot. until now keep reading tapi tak dek lah nak komen2 sangat macam dulu. memang perasaan nak blogging tuh dah kureng kan? tambah2 lagi in ur situation. ramai sangat readers sampai rasa tak secure dah.

actually ur entri yang dulu-dulu banyak buat readers tergelak sorang2 depan pc. tak caya, korek balik entri lama-lama and baca komen diorg. hope u'll get back ur spirit in blogging. chill!! ;)

'D' said... [Reply to Comments]

hai peej...i baca ur blog since the last 2 years...ailaik reading ur blog...try and carik tune balik la...maybe u need a rest?.:-)...u ade ramai fans...hehe...keep on blogging sista!

kak ina mail said... [Reply to Comments]

blog nikan suka-suka.buat apa pedulik ngan kata orang.teruskan berblog.janji ada orang enjoy ngan blog ko.good luck baby.

..tora aziz.. said... [Reply to Comments]

makcik pija..
puhlesssss keep on writing....sbb kalo ko tak tulis blog,aku akan mati akal tak tau nk surf apeeee...

F A R Y N said... [Reply to Comments]

aku suka ko sbb ko suka update pasal makan makanan! haahahahaha

green apple said... [Reply to Comments]

aku pun dah makin malas blog beb. faktor usia kot, dah malas nak merepek (ye sangat lah Diana!). Rasanya dah takde yang best nak diceritakan. Nak pulak skang ni aku muntah tengok blog sendiri, memang lagi lah kannnn.

buyuiazliana said... [Reply to Comments]

hi!ai baru je khatam u punyer entri dedolu...seriyes mcm addict tau baca ur blog..and tetb u rasa dh lemau mcm ni..ai kiciwa la babe..hehe....so i hope u still on this track..anything u nk cerita it's up to u..even bukan pasal kisah diri u pon x pe...mmg kadang2 kita pon pening kan nk pikir nk story ape...tht's normal...

buyuiazliana said... [Reply to Comments]

hi!ai baru je khatam u punyer entri dedolu...seriyes mcm addict tau baca ur blog..and tetb u rasa dh lemau mcm ni..ai kiciwa la babe..hehe....so i hope u still on this track..anything u nk cerita it's up to u..even bukan pasal kisah diri u pon x pe...mmg kadang2 kita pon pening kan nk pikir nk story ape...tht's normal...

syeka sweetheart said... [Reply to Comments]

yg penting saya adalah sgt enjoy
bila bc blog nih..

Foxy Farah said... [Reply to Comments]

tell me about it la kan. tapi walaupun i tak update, mak tetap kunjung blog u n ur family tapi of course silent reader (lol). kdg2 susah nak jumpa korang, so baca blog u :) hope u tak marah if i tanya2 how u been and all. mana tau kau rimas ngan aku nya soalan. nway, guess twitter pun another thing la.hehe. nak blame twitter pulak kan.tapi skang ni mmg la tak mcm dulu. rasa bosan nak update benda yg sama tapi kdg2 orang suka je baca. ntahlah i pun dah boring dgn blog. mmg tak mcm dulu. and hope this thing tak permanentlah. maybe one fine day, dtg la rasa nak blog mcm dulu. maybe. :)

bvlgarigirl @ Arianna said... [Reply to Comments]

No. dont stop blogging. Just malas kan skrg kan, bukan nak stop kannn? you are a good story teller. even entry yang ringkas, tak ada pic pun jadi interesting. coz the way you tell it. everyday, bila aku online mesti cari sama ada blog kau dah update ke tidak peej. u are one of my fav blogger. dont quit. take your time.

aZaMieTa said... [Reply to Comments]

jgn a setop.
hapdet la ape2 pong. bace jek..
besh jek bace. tak bosang pong. jgn setop eh. eh. eh. (^_^)

Mrs.Sheikh said... [Reply to Comments]

salam peeja.
tiba2 entry ni buat i nak komen :)
mmg selama ni jap masuk jap tak je blog u.
sejujurnya, i baca bile i kebetulan online nak memblog.
kalau u masuk 4 tahun, i plak 7 tahun. huhuhu.. mmg betul kata u.
mula2 kite duk cerita personal kite. bile baca balik skrg ni rasa cam, aik napalah aku bengong pi letak pix ni. pi habaq hal ni..:)

skrg i dah private blog sejak 2 thn lepas lepas blogku dibaca oleh budak pejabat yg kaki putar belit menghebahkan yg tidak2 pada org kelilling...sabar aje la kan..

:-) macam u ..i juga dah mula rasa keboringannnnn !!

Kak Ungku Betty said... [Reply to Comments]

Salam...come on Peeja dear...don't stop blogging. The best I'll remember you as my BLOG GURU, OK. I love to read your blog, even though I seldom leave my comments, whenever I feel like missing you & family, I can always read your blog and your mom's as well. There r always ups and downs in life Peeja, when you're down there are a lot you can share with others actually. Life has to go on whether you like it or not. I've gone through hardships in life....I learned from you, to share them and express how I feel through blogging, it's either I 'sink' or 'swim' and I choose to swim. I got married at 35, i share my experience through my blog...'MY COLOURFUL LIFE' how I went through being ANDALUSIA, what people think when I got married to a widower and what so ever. Life isn't easy to all of us...still there's a lot to share, Peeja. It's how you learn to 'paint' your life happy, even how hard it would be....just be happy and share with us how you feel. Keep on blogging, maybe from your perspective it's not interesting but not to others...OK? Take care Peeja.

rainbow said... [Reply to Comments]

I like reading your blog because :

1) you come from a close knit family..
2) your family is always supportive of your actions which is so sweet.
3) u are so strong.. i read and try to be as strong as you after my break up.
4) you are confident and it shows by the way you speak and dress


Abt those privacy issue, maybe as a limitation, u can blog on general things.. mcm fashion (how u dress.. love your make up post aritu), how to deal with problems (ie break up, law suit! hahaha, and pape prob lain laa), recipes, food experiment (esp kalau u pegi try makan tpt2 best).

One suggestion maybe u can do a reader on demand thing, misalnye u tnye reader, nak u try makan kt mane utk review, then konon reader email kata nak u try restoren ABC, then u makan sane then wat review.. at least reader mcm rasa wah bestnye.. yg ni boleh work towards your advantage gak.. mcm kalau restoren tu ada email.. u email manager dia.. bgtau.. your daily reader is this much.. they would like u to blog and review abt their restaurant.. i think the restaurant would be happy to sponsor and allow u to review kan..

just a suggestion..whatever u do, i hope u'll be happy :)) and keep on staying positive..

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